Numb

i feel empty and numb right now. i know it doesnt help but i do love solving my problems with strong drink and cigarettes...they help relieve some tension in everything that happens and i feel like i want to explode and lash out at things. it weird feeling this way: empty and numb, but also at the breaking point of an emotion. very thinly stretched...

also my brother is fucking annoying and i want to smack the shit out of him. all he does is yell and bitch and cause problems...he expects me to treat him like an equal when he acts like a little bitch. my parents dont help matters. he is the baby. he does whatever the fuck he wants. his side is automatically the right side to take with them, no matter what the arguement is over. i just wish i wasnt here. i fucking hate this place, i hate south carolina, and hate that i feel this way, but i do.

fuck maybe i should start a livejournal. this ones getting very fucking emo.

atlanta will be a godsend. spending time with britty is florida will be a godsend. just two more years, then youll never have to come back, if you dont want. two years...

two years until a lot of things...

z out